Respect, love and respect, solutions, arrogant, express your love, spouse, Always, fruit of the Spirit, goodness, healthy marriage,

Do we allow Christ’s love to motivate and control us, or do we go it alone?  If we really, truly believe in Him with sincere trust and obedience, then, it will produce a result.  We must allow that result of fruit (Galatians 5:22-25) be in us.

The ups and downs of marriage may get us down, and the arguments, tension, disagreements, gossip, treachery, betrayal, financial disasters, stress, and false accusations may take its toll on us.  When life seems to rise up and wage war against us, our character can grow stronger and our relationships can improve.  We can become even stronger and more loving—even more content.  The choice is ours!

• To effectively listen, we need to give our spouse our full attention. We must be willing to build the skills of empathetic and active listening. To do this, we first need to concentrate on quieting our own thoughts and concerns so we can hear theirs.  We all have a natural, internal commentary going; try to shut it off until afterwards.  This will help you engage the person and remember what he or she is saying.

Remember that LISTENING IS ESSENTIAL!  Good friend-makers are good listeners. Be the person who listens (John 8:47;James 1:19-25)! 

Unanchored stress and disappointments, along with a detachment from looking to God, will prevent us from seeing His signposts of precepts.  We cannot just expect God to get us through without any effort on our part. To grow, we have to struggle and work it out.  It is the struggle that helps us; it is what builds us and forms us.  Without it, there is no growth or real impacting faith, honest character, genuine patience, or maturity—and thus, unhealthy relationships.

Don’t play these games.  Your marriage and relationships are too precious and valuable to destroy them with our whims or hurts.  Yet, Christians can be some of the most critical and arrogant people on earth!  As Christians, we need to be an example for Him wherever we are, set ourselves above pettiness, and let God remove our pride!

A married couple is on the same team; you are not each other’s enemy!  So, be willing to see your spouse as your teammate, and not your rival.  In that way, you can avoid seeing the other as the problem, and focus on the issue and the solution!

What do you need to do to cement and practice this paramount point to build a healthy marriage, that the heart of any healthy relationship is love and respect?